Friday, February 29, 2008

Are They Serious?


Lance brought this little "guide" home the other night. He started the evening by saying things like, "And now it says you should bring me a drink and rub my feet." We both got a pretty good laugh about it. I checked with Snopes.com for reference and it is undetermined as to if this was an actual article, saying "It has become fashionable to portray outdated social behaviors and attitudes -ones we now consider desperately wrongheaded- to be worse than they really were as a way of making a point about how much we've improved." Either way, I can't imagine living in such a time of repression. I would not be a very "Good Wife".

True or not...I am sure you will get a good laugh.

Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.

Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.

During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.

Be happy to see him.

Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

Don't greet him with complaints and problems.

Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.

Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity.

Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.

A good wife always knows her place.

4 comments:

Hazel Nut said...

Bet that was written by a man! My mother was a wife in the 40's,50's and 60's and I don't remember her doing any of THAT except for the meal part. Sounds like a day in the life of a Stepford wife!

creme brulee said...

I KNEW HAZEL NUT WOULD BEAT TO THIS!

I'm going to try some of the comments on my wife right now.

"Hey Pat, from now on, greet me with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please me."

Why is she laughing at me?

"Hey, it's important to listen to me. You may have a dozen important things to tell me, but the moment of my arrival is not the time. Let me talk first - remember, my topics of conversation are more important than yours."

Why is she leaving the room?

"When you get back here, don't greet me with complaints and problems. And don't complain if I'm late for dinner or even if I stay out all night. Count this as minor compared to what I might have gone through at work."

"Is that a baseball bat you're carrying?"

myshell, good one. it isn't 1955 anymore.

gah

Myshell... said...

Yah Ceeb, lance and I got a good laugh too...Cheers!

Shannon Hodgins said...

I think this is why all the women were popping Valium like crazy then.

O.k., don't wop me one here....but I think BOTH sexes should go back to pampering each other a smooch. I think the gist of the idea here is that your mate should be a very important person in your life. I think if you take all the sexist bullshit out and make sure it is women AND men that get the treatment it would be pretty jazzy.

I LOVE it when I get home from work and husband has cooked, cleaned and gives me a big ole howdy. I like it when he considers my needs, but it has to go both ways.

Now if I could just get him to scrub the potty.........

Seriously, all the other stuff? PLUZZZEEEE. How repressed women in that day must have felt.